Welcome to Rocko’s

Its seven blocks up and one block to the left

You sure?

Yes, he wrote it down

I cant believe they’ll sell to us.

No shit.  What do you want to get?

Lets get a lot.  It will make us look more legit too.

Hahahah!  This is great!

OK, go left here.

There it is!

The three 16 year olds get out of the beat up old VW and walk into the store.

Welcome to Rocko’s.  What are you looking for?

Not sure.  A little bit of a lot.

Alright.  Have a look around.

They cant believe its so easy.

Dave picks a few 12 packs of beer.  So does Marvin.

Will is looking at the liquors.  He has never walked through a liquor store before and didn’t know what he might like.  He looks at a bottle of Tanqueray.  He likes the bright green color of the bottle.

That’s good stuff kid.  Ever have gin?

Uh no.

Well its probably not something to start out on.  Rocko, the grey haired owner and ex-marine, walks over and shows Will a gallon bottle of Dewars.  Ever have scotch kid?


This’ll put hair on your chest but after the first glass, it’ll go down like Snapple.

Will smiles.  Ok, I’ll get this.

Want something to mix it with kid?

It will taste like Snapple?  Naaaaa.  This will do.

Good man.

As they all head to the cash register with their loot, they pass a doorway that leads to a bar.  They can see some pretty dirty looking people drinking and joking around at the bar.  They think it looks like it should be fun, but its kind of disgusting.

Rocko rings them up and puts their purchases in bags.  The three kids put their money together and pay him.  They walk out.


They head back to Will’s house a few towns away in the suburbs.

Will, you gotta thank your brother for us.  How did he ever hear about this place?

I don’t know.  I didn’t think to ask.

When will your parents be back?

They are out for the whole weekend.  Call the girls.  And Phil, Tommy and Leon too.

Three hours later, they are all in the back yard, listening to loud rock.  A few are drinking, Will is walking in circles and his girlfriend Steffany is dancing around him.
Will shouts, I love you Steff!
I love you Will! she replies. Wooo!
Tommy is passed out on the grass and Marvin is puking in his glass.  Ugh, maybe I should have eaten something.

Leon is drunk dancing with Jessica who shouts, “He’s right, it does taste like Snapple!”

An hour later, its still 4pm and everyone is sleeping in the back yard.  Jessica and Leon are spooning.  So are Dave and Sara, but they are head to toe with their arms around each others’ legs.  Sara has vomit on her knees.  Sparky, the family Labrador is on the top floor as far away from the back yard as he can get.  The summer sun slowly falls over time and eventually sets.

The next morning, as the sun rises, they all slowly wake up realizing they have sunburns on the half of their bodies that were facing the sun yesterday afternoon while they slept in the yard.  Sparky comes out, looks around and turns back in to see if there is water in his bowl.

Will walks inside and sees a lot of people sleeping on the couch and floor.

Huh?  I dont remember calling these people.

Tanya wakes up, Will, do you have something to eat?

Uh yeah, check the fridge.  How did you end up here?

We heard you had a shin dig going on.  Don’t worry, we’ll take down the tent as soon as they wake up.


Yeah, in the basement.  Remember?

He goes into the basement and sees a rather large tent pitched and about 20 people sleeping on the floor.  The tent starts shaking which scares him until he hears the sounds of sex.  He’s too hungover to enjoy it.  He puts his head in his hands but then curiosity gets him and he tiptoes around all the sleeping people to look inside and see whos making the noise.  After all it is his house.  As he is almost there, he recognizes the girl’s voice.  Its his girlfriend Steffany.  He stands there in shock for a few seconds but has to break it up.

He looks in and sees her legs wrapped around some guy he never saw before.  What the fuck!

Will!  Oh my god, its not like it looks.

Will hears laughing and turns to see three people watching the events transpire.

He says to one of them, Dude, toss me that bat over there.

The guy looks at the bat, and thinks about whether he should let that happen.

Then the unknown guy in the tent works to get unwrapped from Steffany , puts his pants on a fast as possible, takes a knife out, cuts a line down the other side of the tent and runs, tripping over the sleeping bodies.

Steffany is putting her clothes on when Will yells, Get out!  Outside he can hear the guy’s car start up and drive off quickly.

Will goes up stairs.

He stands in the kitchen devastated

He looks outside and sees Sara putting her shoes on not realizing there is vomit on her knees and now dripping down her legs.  Dave walks in and looks at Will.  Will looks at him, sees he is half sunburnt and starts to laugh.

Dave looks at Will, smiles and says, Great party dude!

This entry was posted in Dialog-y, Stories & Creative Writing. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Welcome to Rocko’s

  1. kjo says:

    This is really fucking good. Best I’ve read of urs. Really cool, foreboding vibe.
    only thought…I wish you could’ve mentioned Steffani earlier. I don’t know why, but the impact of Steffani cheating on him undermined by the fact that we find this out the same line you introduce her.

    But this reminded me of the style of James Frey’s Million Little Pieces (yeah yeah yeah he made shit up. It’s still a damn good book.)



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